I never used to give much thought to what I said. I like to talk, if you've ever had me on the phone you know, I can go on for HOURS! And who doesn't love to hear a bit of gossip? A juicy tidbit about someone or some situation? Usually sharing those little "bits" weren't hurting anyone, no big deal.
Until one day.
One day I repeated something I'd heard about a friend to someone else. It didn't hit me right away, I kind of had to hear myself saying it over and over in my head, it just kept bothering me.
Then it hit me.
I'd repeated something that brought into question my friends religious loyalty. This was a judgement that someone had made, and by my repeating it, I had made too.
I was horrified at what I'd said, it was terrible. It ate at me for a while until my conscious couldn't stand it anymore. I humbly ran to my friends house to apologize. Running because if I didn't do it right then I might have chickened out. She would never have known what I'd done, it may never have gotten back to her. But then again, it might have. I have never felt so low and awful about myself before.
That experience more than anything I've heard or read, really changed how I view gossip and the lives it effects.
This is a fault that I despise about myself, but change is possible, I know. I'm not perfect, I still love to talk and often share stories, this is something I'll always have to work on. But I try to keep it to things I know are not hurtful, are true, and if not then I recall how I felt when I shared that awful comment. Not repeating gossip isn't always easy.
Recently a close family member has become the subject of hurtful and false gossip. It's heart breaking watching them hold their head up high trying to rise above it. I wish that somewhere out there is someone that cares enough to NOT repeat the things they've heard.
Making a conscious effort to share or not share something you've overheard could be of no consequence to anyone but yourself, but even that is enough to think before you speak.
